The Game of Life: What Pete Sampras Can Teach Us About “Getting a Feeling”

Michael Neill (my mentor and coach), once shared a story about a guest lecturer, George Pransky, recounting a conversation between a friend of his and Pete Sampras, the long-time world number one tennis player. It’s a story that holds a profound lesson for us about how we experience life.

George’s friend asked Sampras how he remained composed on the court while others seemed consumed by the highs of victory and the lows of defeat after every point. Sampras laughed and admitted that his thoughts and emotions were just as turbulent as anyone else’s.

Not entirely convinced, the friend pressed further: “Does that ever affect the quality of your tennis?”

“Absolutely,” Sampras replied. “If I get too caught up in my thinking or a bad mood, I play much worse.”

The friend, still curious, asked, “Well, what would happen if you got caught up on match point?”

Sampras answered simply: “I would probably lose the match.”

Still puzzled, the friend inquired, “So if you have just as much thinking and emotion as everyone else on the tour, why doesn’t it seem to affect you as much?”

Sampras paused before offering this profound insight: “Because I don’t really care what I think or what experience I’m having. A lot of these other guys – it really seems to matter to them.”

Finally, the friend asked, “But if you don’t care about what you think or your experience, what do you care about?”

Sampras smiled. “Playing tennis. I care about playing tennis.”

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This story highlights a fundamental truth about human beings: we live in the feeling of our thinking. But here’s the twist: how much our thoughts and emotions affect our effectiveness, our joy, and our quality of life is determined by how much significance we give them.

It’s not the presence of a particular thought or feeling that shapes our experience; it’s how much importance we attach to it.

Imagine thoughts and feelings as the weather. Some days are sunny, others stormy. You can’t control the weather, but you can stand in the rain and complain or grab an umbrella and go about your day. Thoughts are designed to flow like clouds moving across the sky. Some might bring rain, others sunshine, but they’re all part of a natural rhythm.

The trouble begins when we decide that a certain thought or feeling shouldn’t exist. We resist it, fight it, analyze it, and, in doing so, get stuck in it. That’s when we lose sight of the bigger game of life—the game of simply being present, engaged, and alive in the moment.

What Pete Sampras understood on the tennis court is equally relevant to everyday life. When we stop giving so much weight to our transient thoughts and emotions, we free ourselves to focus on what truly matters. For Sampras, that was playing tennis. For you, it might be connecting with loved ones, excelling at your work, or simply enjoying the journey.

Living with this awareness doesn’t mean we won’t have bad days, negative thoughts, or uncomfortable emotions. It means we’ll recognize them for what they are: passing experiences that don’t define us or dictate our quality of life unless we let them.

So, the next time you find yourself caught up in a swirl of thinking, take a moment to ask:

Does this really matter? And if it doesn’t, what does matter right now?

The answers may surprise you. And, like Pete Sampras, you might just find yourself playing – and living – with much more ease and grace.

What are you thinking? Let me hear. Share your insights and thoughts on how you experienced them.

Until next time.

Much love,

4/100

Here is another take on this. It’s a clip from NCIS: Intuition vs Anticipation: Chess Strategy